Mussar in the climate of Conservative Judaism and the teaching of Emmanuel Levinas

How to forget your ex love?

In general, this advice could be in the book of Gregory Oster. You are trying to forget your ex, and for some reason we advise you to sleep with her. The thing is that the ancient Russian concept of "wedge by wedge" in sex (but not in the literal sense) also sometimes works.

Let's make a reservation that we are taking the case when you were forced to leave - it seemed like you didn't want this, and there was no other option. For example, she left you - she did not have enough attention, she fell out of love, she wants to be alone, not the point why, but she left. Or your beloved has cheated on you. You still have powerful feelings for her, but how could it be that he went to the left, you are a man and you cannot forgive adultery with this frivolous walking girl.

The result is the same: you are angry and offended at her, grumble at a cruel fate and universal injustice, save all evil bars from bankruptcy and rush from girl to girl, unconsciously comparing each new passion with your ex and realizing that they are all no good for her. Or they simply do not evoke such feelings and emotions in you. There must be philosophical quotes somewhere that you no longer believe in love.

In fact, unexpectedly broken relationships always give rise to unclosed gestalts in the head. They are primarily related to sex. If you met for more or less a long time (at least, say, longer than three or four months), you got to know each other very well from an intimate point of view, found out what your preferences in bed are, moved on to experiments and learned how to deliver such orgasms, on what casual acquaintances are hardly capable of. According to hundreds of researchers, the best sex is always in a relationship, because it is imbued with deeper emotions and feelings and tested empirically.

Therefore, thoughts begin to come to you that it will not be so good (unless, of course, you broke up because of problems in bed), that no girl satisfies you as much as your ex, that you missed that very last time, because everything ended so suddenly. We are sure that in one way or another, having sex with your ex after the end of your relationship (but not the next day, at least try to forget her a little) will help you get over the breakup.

1. You will forgive her

The first scenario is the most favorable for you. You can just let go of the situation and forgive the girl. When emotions are raging in us and hormones are raging, we rarely think with our heads. And where is the citadel of male enzymes - we all know. Instead of long fights and attempts to find out everything, instead of screaming and crying, try to just sleep. That very goodbye sex can help close this page of life and move on. But keep in mind: if even for a second after a passionate meeting you think something like "now let him find such a partner for sex that will be cooler than me!" - not a damn thing you could not let go and forget.

2. Hate her even more

This is the most deplorable option. Either the sex will be so good that it will hurt you to lose it, because you still cannot forgive. Or you will be angry with yourself that you cannot forget and let go, and therefore you will project an even greater image of the enemy onto her. Or, after sex, you will still go on to a long swearing with a mutual exchange of accusations and debriefing, which will overshadow all the good impressions of orgasm. Our advice: to avoid this situation, close the gestalt when you have cooled down a little. If you keep burning her things in the yard, crying in the bar after the third whiskey and telling all your colleagues what a bitch she is, you better hold your horses for now.

3. Get back together

In all respects, there are irreconcilable clashes of views, conflicts, a struggle between two egos, disputes and disagreements. If it seems to you that one of your friends has an ideal personal life, believe me, most likely, you just do not know a lot (they do not turn personal into public, and they do it right). It is not for nothing that they say that relationships are a lot of work on oneself and on finding a compromise. It is possible that in the heat of a quarrel, you focused on negative emotions and completely forgot about the feelings that force you to be together. Farewell sex will remind you why you still fell in love with each other and endured for so long, and will give you the idea that maybe you shouldn't give up on everything and there is still a chance to work on the relationship. Another question is if someone cheated on someone. We almost always promise in advance that we will never forgive adultery. What if there is true love between people, no one will go to the left. Anyway, I'm a man here, I have a lot of testosterone, I can sometimes change, but this is strictly forbidden to her. Each case is individual, we will only say that two are always to blame for any conflict: neither you nor your beloved will cheat just like that, from nothing to do, if everything is fine in your relationship. Perhaps forgiving sex on the side (true, one-off sex and, for example, a long romance in parallel are completely different stories) and accepting a person if you love them very much will be much easier but you can always find some new partner for sex and dating

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